The New Medicine

18 May 2020

A rainy Monday here in the north.  Rained all day yesterday. Supposed to rain all day today. At 4 p.m. the rain has varied from a downpour to a light mist.  This return of moisture to the earth did not impact my activities, a trip to the plant center, a trip to return a router to my internet provider and a video conference with my doctor. I even worked in doing a load of laundry from washing to folding to putting it away. I also potted four plants.

Drop after drop this current rain event has not impacted the birds or the squirrels in the least.  At 5:00 a.m. the avian chorus began kicking in right on time. All day the squirrels have been dancing through the drops going “chuck, chuck, chuck.” There appears to be a bit of a battle royal over who controls the dead tree on my easterly property line.  In a large puddle down the street three birds flitted about. These birds were treating the really big puddle as they would a bird bath.  Watching them splash and shake their wings was fun.

The trip to the garden center was strategically plotted.  It rained all day yesterday thus damping down the enthusiasm of local gardeners.  With a second day of rain we assumed (correctly) that almost nobody would be there.  The garden center covers several acres and the customers were maintain a good 20-foot distance between each other.  The staff restocking from the weekend’s crowd were the only people who really weren’t totally observing social distancing.  However, everyone, staff and customers were wearing gloves and masks. $200 fly from my hands with nary a glance at another person.

My physician’s office has put in a new policy.  If you need a refill on a prescription and you haven’t seen the doctor in over six months, well you either have to come in for a face to face visit or you have to do a tele-med visit.  Before you do the tele-med visit you have to call in and give them your temperature, blood pressure and weight.  I have a cuff, a scale and a couple of thermometers so no problem.  However, I am pretty sure not every person has this equipment in their medical cabinet.

Guessing beforehand this was a profit motivated change (which could be argued to be tied to medical necessity), I assumed that office visits had plummeted since March and the stay at home orders.  Please note, I have been refilling Singulair for 8 years without a six-month visit.  It is a mild allergy drug. I joked with the nurse who called to set up the video visit, and obtain my vitals (that I myself took), that given the drop on in person visits this must be bottom line based.  She laughed and said, “You may have got that right.”  She then said still with an almost laugh in the voice, “I have to read this to you.  The tele-med visit you are agreeing to participate in will be charged to you insurance company as a regular visit…” I snorted out loud.  She kept her composure. 

My doctor was in a convivial mood.  I have worked with him for a long, long time. I think our relationship goes back thirty years with a short break when he changed practices and due to a noncomplete clause could not accept his old patients for a one-year window. I did have some question and answered those questions cheerfully and clearly.  He renewed my prescriptions. Still won’t give me a weed card although you don’t need a card anymore. He asked me about my reprobate friends, John and Rick. I told him they were doing good and I would pass his good wishes on. I had referred them as patients to him years ago.  They have both retired and gone to warmer climates.  

In the old days he would shake my hand as I left, or perhaps pat me on the shoulder.  For me, and for pretty much everyone else, that stuff is gone, probably forever.  I offer this one piece of advice. You know you are toast when all your doctor wants to talk about is the weather or sports.  Pay attention for such a conversation.

Oh, the visit to the internet service provider was weird.  We have bought our own router and needed to return the old router.  The service locale is a little way away and we went there over lunch.  We rang the buzzer; it was a slow steady rain at that point.  The tech/service representative came to the door and pointed to a plastic bin near the door.  I asked how will you know what account this router is for.  In a muffled voice, behind a locked glass door he said it would be scanned in.  Good thing I put the device in a plastic bag.  

I assume going forward we will be moving to service set ups like the old party stores in non-gentrified Detroit.  Just like those Chaldean bodegas you will greet the clerk through bullet proof glass and talk to him or her on an intercom.  You will put your part of the transaction on a turntable of bullet proof glass and the clerk will turn it returning to you the merchandise you have sought. The world will never be the same.

I know the following has no real relationship to what I have been talking about.  Still it is real pretty.